It’s the first time I’m celebrating your birthday, because unfortunately I didn’t know you this time around last year. April 19 back then was an insignificant day, irrelevant, just like any other normal day in a year. Little did I know it would become one of those days I’d truly cherish.
Somehow I feel stupid writing this because I’m sure you wouldn’t even know about this, but you’ve changed my life so much it’s only fair that I let the whole world know how thankful I am for you. You saved me. You gave me purpose and you gave me strength. You came into my life when everything else was dark and dull, and somehow everything just seemed beautiful again. Because I was looking at you and all I see is how beautiful you are — inside and out.
When I first got into K-Pop, I had always been into dancers. That, or rappers. I was close to believing that was pretty much set in stone, but you came in and you changed everything, precisely because you were different — the most wonderful, pleasant, beautiful kind of different. And that’s what I love most about you; because you’re you.
You’re Kim Himchan. Music is your life and you’re an incredibly talented and gifted musician. Please never doubt yourself. You’re beautiful, regardless of your hair color, or how much you weigh, or how bad your skin gets from too much make up. You go on the most ridiculous diet habits you end up starving yourself and I hope you refrain from doing that, because above everything your health is most important. And really, you’re already wonderful as you are. You keep your burdens to yourself because you don’t like expressing your feelings but I hope you somehow find a way to release your worries because your fears of people leaving you and not supporting you are not true. I know you won’t be an idol forever, and you have worries of how things will be when that happens but I want to assure you someone as wonderful as you are will never be alone because someone like you can only be surrounded with so much love and more. So for today, I hope you can push all your worries aside and enjoy this very special day. Don’t go on a diet! Stuff yourself with cake and seaweed soup and chicken and sushi and everything you want to eat!
Happy birthday, Kim Himchan. Thank you — for being you, for pursuing what you love most, for never giving up, for standing proudly on stage as a member of B.A.P, for carrying the immense responsibility of being the visual, for being the mother of the bunch, for being the honest person that you are, for being sensitive, for having that beautiful smile, for letting us know who you are, for constantly pushing yourself to be a better person, for making me believe it is right to dream because a person is most beautiful when he dreams, and ultimately, for being such an inspiration and for being the best person to love and look up to.
I wish you happiness — whatever form it may be. May you continue to have the drive, the strength, and the courage to search for that happiness and grab it. And may today be one of your most memorable birthdays.
Babys love you, B.A.P members love you, your co-workers love you, your colleagues, friends, and family love you… I love you. And I’m proud to have gotten to know and love you. Thank you. Happy birthday!